The Breakfast Lasagne

This one effs with your senses since you can't tell what you are tasting, its cool

Every 15-16 weeks I am asked to bring bagels to the office on a Friday morning for about 15-16 people.  Now, as far as I know, I am the only one in the group to create and maintain a highly unsuccessful food blog (read as, I spend tons of time to make it, and make no money from it = unsuccessful), so there is always a huge amount of pressure to step up to the plate.  I like to think that I do, and this was very well received.  Lots going on here.

The idea behind this dish, is that, well, I effing love lasagne, but because of the pasta and cheese, its hard to call it even close to paleo.  So what to do?  Ditch the pasta, keep an amount of dairy, and make it for breakfast.  The challenges?  Eggs, taste, texture, look, plating, planning, cooking, creating.  The reward? Eating.

Come with me on a journey...

The Prep
I'll try to walk you through the fundamentals of this dish too, when I can. Basically, what we need to understand is what traditional lasagne tastes like: delicious sauce, mixed with delicious meat, mixed with delicious cheese, mixed with baked texture goodness.  Now the challenge: what makes those things delicious?

Spinach: blanch a head or two of it, depending on how much you are making: boiling water, two minutes in, rinse in cold water.  Save. 

Grass fed ground beef: saute 3 pounds in spicy olive oil, sage, thyme, basil, oregano, minced garlic cloves, salt and pepper to taste on every single ingredient.  Cool to room temperature. 

The Sauce: blend for 6 minutes (until piping hot) two organic orange carrots (these are kinda small), half of one stalk of celery, like 6-8 tomatoes, two cloves garlic, a pinch of salt, lots of ground pepper, and a pinch of crushed red pepper, a little water too, and a pinch of thyme and sage.  It will be piping hot when done, so cool and then re-blend.  This tastes nasty by itself, so do not use it for any other application.  Read the caption of the photo, this is part of the mind fuck that the blender can do. 

Potatoes: slice about 5 russet potatoes thinly (using a lame electric slicer), parboil for 10 minutes, drain and cool.

Cheeses: buy a pound each of full fat ricotta, Parmesan, and mozzarella, shredded to save time, high quality to save your life.

Eggs: Beat 18 eggs until smooth, and then add 2 cups of full fat milk, and re-beat.

Tomatoes: Slice 6 tomatoes ATAP (as thinly as possible, buy hand so they have some thickness)

You have to time these steps appropriately.  You want your potatoes done before your beef, long enough so that the potatoes are warm and you can handle them, and the beef is hot enough so the fat is still rolling around.

The Assembly
Okay, so here is where the step by step instructions might break down for a lot of people. First things first: we have multiple stages of assembly to make this dish fantastic, and not just 'fine'.  Second: there are timed stages of cooling that we must pay attention too.  Third, do not second guess your instincts, unless your instincts contradict this recipe.

Step 1: Place a layer of potatoes on the pans (mine were a 3" deep 12" x 12", and a 3" x 10" x 18").  My potatoes were falling apart to a great extent, so they turned into like a firm mash.

Step 2: Evenly spread still super runny ground beef and equally distribute the fat over the potatoes.

Step 3:  Let all that shit cool down to room temperature.

Step 4:  Now, spread your ricotta over the beef, cover in  half of the Parmesan cheese, pour about half the sauce over pans.  Spread spinach over the bed of deliciousness.  Add another layers of potatoes.  Cover with half the mozzarella. 

Step 5: Pour the eggs and milk mixture over that evenly. Cover with the rest of the sauce, evenly.

Step 6: Cover in the other half of the mozzarella, and then top with sliced tomatoes, garnish with fresh cracked pepper.

The Bake
I did 350F for 1h 15min, 15min at 375F.  Remove, cover, and sit for 15 minutes.  It was still bubbling.

The Reward
Shit tasted like a fucking proper lasagne.  Cheesy, saucy, meaty, pasta-ee, delicious. Cut like a fucking lasagne too.  I even heard things like: "The pasta is perfect.", "It tastes exactly like lasagne, but there is no sauce."  "This is like the Italian breakfast burrito." "This is really good." "He had three pieces..."